These days I'm feeling a reversal of my energy. Not too long ago I was outwardly calm and sometimes inwardly nervous, feeling assaulted by outside opinions and needs of other people. Now there's a well of certainty in the middle of me that's radiating outward. Certainty about what, I don't know. I seem to be in "mom" mode, except without kids, taking care of N., helping violin, dance, and high school students along, supporting friends. Do people sense this? Suddenly everyone is hugging me, or maybe I'm hugging everybody, it's hard to know with these things. Friends are looking to me for stability, and though I'm perpetually tired from my usual crazy schedule, it's OK. Stability is my gift to everyone right now, the quiet stomach to the nth degree. I still have plenty of unresolved quesitons about what I'm doing and where I'm going, but at the moment I've settled into that uncertainty. Now, somehow, I'm an anchor for friends with that same uncertainty. Weird.
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