This morning I was in the office waiting to make copies when another teacher said with mild disbelief, "you're still walking, huh?" I was a little taken aback; most people are a bit more supportive of my efforts post-paralysis. Then I realized he meant I'm still walking to school. (I'm known as a "health nut" because I walk to school from my house, which is a little more than 5 minutes away on foot). Suddenly it struck me: none of the teachers at school know I couldn't walk 4 years ago, and probably would never suspect it. It's exhilarating and yet strange to look normal on the outside even though my body doesn't feel like it's 100% functional.

Today, as I had been hoping, I was invited to play in a big Tango orchestra in Cambridge over Halloween weekend. Last week, planning for this hoped-for event, I splurged and bought the coolest thing since my folding bicycle: a Petersen folding music stand. Now this is a stand I can bring to gigs. Totally professional, light, compact, and sturdy. Easy to assemble and disassemble, and stores its legs and tube inside the desk of the stand when folded. So, so cool. You need one of these. :-)

Despite being exhausted, I'm happy. Violin/viola students are sounding great and their technique is looking better and better. On the Computer Tech front, 6 parents (5 accompanied by their sons) stopped by to chat at Thursday evening's Open House. I thought this was low but today I learned that 6 is much higher than usual. Progress reports are in. The long weekend is here.

Teaching has been exhausting and exasperating at times, but those "aha" moments with students carry me through. Seeing that flash of understanding on a student's face...well, not much else is cooler than that. Thursday night the mother of one student said she'd been anxious to meet me all day because her son couldn't stop talking about the computer class, was doing work at home, and was (for the first time in ages) getting interested in other schoolwork too. She said, "He said to me, 'Ms. Green never sits at her desk!'" So true...I don't usually get a chance to sit down until the end of the day. But life is still good. :-)

So, I'm totally psyched that I'm reaching some students, particularly those who usually don't like school. On the other hand, I stress out a lot about how to reach the many kids with ADHD (some on medication and some not) and how to keep them from disrupting the rest of the class. I need to clone myself...

Thank Goodness It's Friday. And it's a long weekend. If I didn't have to leave for a wedding gig tomorrow morning, I would sleep until noon. Maybe Sunday.

Saturday afternoon, while driving home from a wedding gig, M. and I attempted to think of double bass players who might want to play in a Tango band. No dice. And electric bassists are pretty much out, since I want somebody who can bow an upright.

Tonight I hauled myself downtown to go to the Sunday practica (not having danced since June). There I met an old high school classmate, (a pianist), and as she described the gig she'd played on Saturday night it dawned on me that she was not describing a piano gig. Nope, when she started talking about trying to find an electric upright so she wouldn't have to haul around "this cavernous sound chamber" I realized that she now plays bass. And she loves Tango. And, as I quickly discovered, is totally psyched to get a group going.

Woohoo!

It's the end of a long week (though only 4 days...it sure seems like more) and I'm smiling inside. It's Friday. Rain is drumming on the roof as I sit in the attic and transcribe music to put on the Web for my students. I've given my first test in Computer Tech, every student except one showed up for it, and all of my students have made some improvement this week. I gave a really weird violin lesson to one of my adult students (picture us lying on the carpet breathing while her 12-year-old son watches us with mild disbelief from the couch...) and she trusted me and really got it and will be a completely different violinist by next week. I made some killer asparagus and avocado sushi rolls. I discovered my spiccato problem and began to take steps to fix it. I realized that I'm going to be able to play Nutcracker this year without "cheating" in places because my left hand feels [mostly] like a hand.

These are all good. Especially the hand. But the big moment happened yesterday afternoon as I dashed across the busy street on my walk home from school. I reached the other side and realized that I hadn't even thought about it; I'd just looked both ways and gone for it. I would never have tried that last year because I'd have been afraid that the leg would trip and I'd end up getting nailed.

Taking things like running across the street for granted. Life is amazing.

Bonita's internal alarm clock goes off at 4 a.m., at which time I am usually treated to 2 hours of sounds of Bonita rustling papers, jumping into boxes, knocking things off of shelves, batting loose change around, purring loudly, licking my face, and trying to burrow under the blankets with me. At 6 a.m. this morning I enjoyed watching the sun rise from my bed and then decided I would get up, once Bonita had finally curled up on my chest for a nap after her pre-dawn exploits. Arrrgh.

So this morning I:

- did my usual 18-minute morning exercise routine
- almost finished digging a swale behind the garage
- walked over to the bank and the supermarket
- took a bike ride to drop off my library books and check out the mulch situation at the recycling facility, featuring an extremely long incline on the way home
- vaccuumed my apartment so Bonita could kick litter all over the damn place again

And then I:
- crashed on the couch for an hour and a half
- went to the camp with the fam to take the docks out of the water
- had a family dinner at the Great Lost Bear
- showered, changed, and danced for 4 hours at the milonga downtown.

Now I'm wired and I need to get to sleep so I can get up and sing in church tomorrow. Help!

That was one of the comments on my first Probationary Teaching Report after the assistant principal observed my Thursday morning class. I didn't realize until later that day (chatting with some other teachers) that most teachers tell their students ahead of time when someone will be observing! I had thought it would be more indicative of the usual classroom experience if I didn't tell my class, so I didn't. Instead, Brian arrived and I said, "Mr. Britting is here with us today, so try not to set anything on fire." I hope he knew I was joking...

I keep pinching myself to make sure I'm really teaching. Everything seems to be going well, and I'm now actually getting some sleep during the week. Yay!

I'm starting to dread looking in my mailbox at school because now the 504s are rolling in. Every couple of days I get another envelope marked "confidential" that notifies me of a student in my class who is covered under Section 504.

Section 504 is a law designed to protect people with disabilities. It affects me because I am legally required to provide all Section 504 students 'with equal opportunities "to obtain the same result, to gain the same benefit, or to reach the same level of achievement" as students without disabilities'. This often means allowing students to turn in work late, have more time on tests, be tested orally rather than by a written test, and various other leniencies.

Of course I support legislation to protect people who are truly disabled, but I think it's being abused. I see too many of my 504 students who have no trouble grasping the concepts covered in class; they're just lazy. And they tell me things like "I have trouble focusing...I should be on medication but I'm not".

Fine. But faced with a high schooler who "has trouble focusing" and has a 504 that says he should be allowed to turn in work late and who, if I stand right behind him so that he's doing work and not playing computer games, is actually very quick to pick up concepts and put them into practice, I wonder: where is the accountability? When will this kid ever develop a work ethic? In 2 years this student will be out getting a job and while an employer can't discriminate against him based on gender, race, or a host of other things, the employer can and will discriminate against him based on whether he can do the job. Obviously. Otherwise, what would be the point of an interview? Wouldn't it be easier on everyone if this student could learn to focus now while he has resources rather than when he's out of school and trying to join the workforce?

It seems to me that in too many cases, 504s are giving students an excuse (a legal excuse!) to be sloppy and that hurts both them and our society. I'm really shocked at the level of "it's not my fault" that I see now on a daily basis.