Vote Lisp Machine in '96!
Because today is the car of the cdr of your life.
This page is sponsored by XELM,
The Committee to Help Elect the
The Lisp Machine has retired from active duty to concentrate on its
election bid. Here are some reasons why you should consider casting
your vote for the Lisp Machine:
- Having worked in both corporate offices and in academic settings,
the Lisp Machine understands the opinions and feelings of both the car
and the cdr--er, the Left and the Right.
- Better than most, the Lisp Machine is supremely placed to
empathize with the unemployed and destitute.
- The Lisp Machine is no light-weight, and when it works, its
intensity and fervour can warm the coldest hearts (and feet, and
- The Lisp Machine has experience working the numbers, and promises
to balance the deficit and pay off the debt. (Indeed, it is one of
the few candidates that can even compute the debt!)
- While other candidates merely talk about safety, the Lisp Machine
implements safety ... especially type- and space-safety.
- With the Lisp Machine in office, our streets will be clean:
garbage collection will no longer be an issue.
- The Lisp Machine speaks CommonLisp, ZetaLisp, Scheme, and a
variety of other languages; likewise, it can communicate via numerous
networks. Which other candidate can show such broad credentials and
such a commitment to diversity?
- The Lisp Machine proposes novel prison reforms: violent criminals
will be released only after they have evaluated Omega. It is believed
that this program will also endow prisoners with valuable technical
skills when they emerge.
- The lack of motorization for the wheels of the Lisp Machine
demonstrate its preference for finding energy-efficient solutions to
modern problems of transportation.
- In times of both strife and glory, Americans look for presidential
behavior in their top leader. Who can better the Lisp Machine at
- The Lisp Machine is proud to be American. This is why it is a
Lisp machine, rather than a Prolog machine or a Pascal
- The lambda is given pride-of-place to show the Lisp Machine's
commitment to equal protection and rights to all Americans, regardless
of their sexual orientation.
- The Lisp Machine is firmly committed to a strong set of family
values. This is evident from the fact that its family, Lisp, thinks
of everything as having a value.
The Committee notes that Gen. Colin Powell is yet to deny rumors that
he wishes to be the Lisp Machine's running mate.
Let hackers and wireheads grovel and curse,
Chase pointers and seg fault in C;
Our LispM shall never fandango on core --
Content with hard CDR are we!
XELM also includes Jeremy Buhler, Kathi Fisler, Chris Hyams and Phil